Getting out there a bit – Amazing things I am doing this year

I’m not very good at self promotion. It’s an important part of my job but I don’t know the difference between promoting myself effectively and being an arrogant dick. Turns out I tend to sway towards the latter given the opportunity.


(I have one of these Tshirts only in blue because it really brings out my eyes)

However I have got some awesomely fantastic things I’m doing this year that I really need you to see. I’m going to do this chronologically so you can stick it in your diaries, you may even need a new diary just to have one specifically for Purch-related dates because there are so many (there are 2).

First off as I’ve been blogging about I’m doing my first hour long solo show this year! YAY! Tickets are now on sale for it! Double YAY! It’s on Saturday 9th November at the Kings Arms in Manchester as part of the Greater Manchester Comedy Festival –

For those of you who are Facebook inclined here is the event – FACEBOOK EVENT!

And for those of you living in 1997 here is the direct ticket link – BUY MY TICKETS!

I mean that right there is a link to buy tickets for my own solo show, if I sell one ticket I will be happy. I would be happier if I sold out the full 70 tickets but one person purposefully buying a ticket to see me talk about some of the scarily soap opera like things I’ve been through is a big ego boost. It won’t feed the kids but it will stop me crying myself to sleep in the bath.

The show is about the things that have happened to my little family and how it lead to us getting to where we are. Expect a rollarcoaster of emotions. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll find yourself in a bath of ice missing a kidney.


(Turns out it’s remarkably painless, except for the pissing blood of course that I could do without)

The second big thing I’ve signed up for is James Alderson’s Mic, Bike and Hike. This involves 12 comedians walking from London to Portsmouth over 5 days. We start at the Comedy Pub in Soho and we end at Spinnaker Tower in Portsmouth. Every night we’ll perform a gig at the town we collapse in. It’s all in aid of Macmillan Cancer Research so it’s for a good cause.

You can donate by texting MBNH55 and the amount (i.e. £5) to 70070 and keep up with the latest news from it on Twitter

It’s not until 22nd of June next year but that means I have time to whip myself into shape as currently that shape is “sculpture made of bacon” or “fresh kebab meat cooking”


(Yep definitely ready for a 125 mile walk, come on keep those legs up!)

BBC News South are going to be covering the whole thing but personally it’s a reason to get fit. Going from walking 5 miles a day to 25 miles a day is a big adjustment so I’m doing it gradually and with the aid of incentives. I lost 3 stone earlier this year and have kept it off so this is another reason to try to slim down a bit more.

See I need reasons like this to lose weight. Screw fitness levels or the chance of having multiple heart attacks because I use clotted cream instead of milk on my Oreo cereal in the morning, I need a completely arbitrary reason to get in shape. Last time it was to fit into a suit this time it’s to raise money for charity, next time it’ll be because I want to get on rides at Alton Towers.


(Totally worth it)

It should be amazing fun for all involved and hell if something like this doesn’t prove that comedians are dedicated to helping humanity then I don’t know what does. Angelina Jolie might adopt an entire Cambodian village but has she ever walked 125 miles in 5 days WHILE filming Tomb Rider 8: Revenge of the nipples? No she hasn’t!

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